I’ve been a bit quiet on the blog recently, as I’ve been busy setting up various projects which I shall be blogging and sharing about soon. The whole purpose of me setting up my blog was to share my post baby weight loss. And although that was the catalyst the blog it self has evolved, much like myself over the past 4 months.
I mean 4 months isn’t a long time in the grand scheme of things but blogging for me has really helped me to analyse and make decisions in my life, important decisions. And I put this all down to one thing, my original decision back in January, to sell my car.
If it wasn’t for selling my car and making myself walk everyday to do the school run I wouldn’t be at the stage I’m at now. Every day that I walk I’m left with only myself to think and question my life. It’s the time I use to have ideas and to make things happen. It was my first day of walking that I decided to blog and from blogging I have highlighted other things that are important to me and how I want to change my life for the better.
Walking has also given me the opportunity to make new friends. Instead of jumping in and out of my car and running into the school because I’m late, as usual, I now have the time to chat and make friends.
I thought that the biggest positive of walking would be the exercise and weight-loss, but turns out that’s just a by product. For me ditching the car was a huge lifestyle change but now it’s just the norm, and 4 months later I’m still pounding the pavement. But I won’t lie, I am starting to wish I had a car, not for the school run, but for the little journey’s and the social aspect of being able to visit friends and take day trips out with the kids.
So I’ve decided it’s time to get back behind the wheel, I will continue to walk my school runs and just use the car when I need too.
I’ve lost 25lbs in total but I don’t think the walking is helping much now towards my weight loss. I’ve still got 19lbs to lose to get to my overall goal of 11 stone, ideally I’d like to be 10 stone but I’m realistic.
I am so proud in what I have achieved, but now I have to open a new chapter and challenge myself more. I was so focused when I first began this journey but over the last 6 weeks my focus has been geared towards other important things in my life, hence the projects I’ve been working on. I’m actually having to remind myself that this is still important to me and convince myself that I can still achieve my goal.
So this month I’m completing the 30 day shred and trying hard to stay away from those pesky takeaways.
Although I’ve not been sharing I’ve still been completing my video diary, I just need to find the time now to get updated and back on the blogging horse.
I’m actually starting to feel more myself this week. I treated myself to a new coat and some boots and getting up in the morning and doing my hair doesn’t actually feel like a chore anymore. I’ve actually gained some of my identity back. I’m still a little tired and dealing with the affliction of leaky boobs. But I don’t feel so battered and bruised.
I’ve also noticed that the pity looks that mothers with newborns get are few and far between when you look like you had time to brush your hair and put on concealer. And you know what I mean by pity looks or you could call them I don’t envy you, your completely mad, I wouldn’t do that again looks. But I may look slightly polished on the outside but the truth remains, I still take my makeup off with wetwipes, that fancy SPF skin cream I used to use has been replaced with coco butter and this long fancy red coat I’m rocking is hiding the leaking baby milk and baby sick stains.
I’m along way off from feeling fantastic but I’m much happier looking in the mirror and seeing me again.
I will always be a mother and that will always be part of my identity, however it’s equally as important to feel like I’m more than just a mother.
Blogging also helps with this, I’ve always been that person that has to be doing something, has to be working towards something. So now that my baby is 9 weeks old and I’m getting a little bit more sleep, I can be me a little bit more. Not just that tired looking mum with the dishevelled hair at the school gates.
Don’t get me wrong I still have days where I have to where a hat because I simply don’t have time to do both my hair and makeup. But I’ve not left the house without makeup since 1995 and I’m not going to start now.
But despite my appearance I’m still feeling a little bit down on myself, I suffer from Psoriasis and since I was 36 weeks pregnant it’s gotten worse and worse. So the past 9 weeks I’ve felt tired, flabby and scabby to top it all off.
So despite losing 13lbs in the last 9 weeks I’m still a little flabby and a lot scabby but I’m definitely going to make the most of having more sleep, even if I do spend more awake time making myself look pretty.
When did you start to feel more yourself after childbirth?
I’m still buzzing from last week’s 3lbs weight-loss, and have found it extremely easy going into this week on a health food mission.
I can not believe that it will be 4 weeks since I sold the car and started my new walking regime. By the end of this week I would have walked 104 miles and possibly more as that’s not including my short journey’s to the shops or the doctor’s and there have been a few!
I’m feeling great and really embracing my new routine. Initially I thought it would be really difficult to give up the car, but it really has been an easy transition. This week has been all about healthy eating and breaking bad food habits so my dinners have mainly consisted of salads. But what I have realised is I have to be weary of my portion size and those hidden calories.
What I mean by hidden calories is the calories that are sitting in plain site on my daughter’s plate, I just can’t help myself.
My husband works late most nights and I wait to have dinner with him, so this is a huge time gap inbetween my lunch and dinner for me to snack. So I have tried to buy dinners this week that I can cook separately, hence the salads. But I’m still snacking, so I’ve bought lots of fruit and 0% fat yoghurt. But I think I’ve finally found that balance, between a healthy diet and easy exercise routines, it’s got to the point where I don’t even have to think about food or exercise. And any exercise I do is because I want to do it, not because I feel guilty and have to. Now I just have to maintain this lifestyle and not drop into bad habits again!
I have been obsessed with weighing myself this week despite my scales being broken.
But I thought I was on top of things this week, don’t get me wrong I’m still tired, but what’s different now is I’m used to the night feeds and the early starts. Well that’s what I thought until I checked my diary and realised that once again I had double booked my doctor’s appointment with my baby group. I’m seriously not having much luck with my dates at the moment!
But this week we opted to keep our appointment at the doctor’s and miss half of group. I have noticed without a car, situations like this seem much more stressful than what they are, but I’m not deterred from walking, Despite the cold and it has been cold!
I could put this second mishap down to the tiredness but as well as being tired I’ve not been able to stop thinking about weigh in or should I say not being able to weigh in, pretty sad really! So even though the scales stopped working at the beginning of the week I couldn’t help but try them again and guess what? They actually worked, I couldn’t believe it, especially as they showed a 3lbs weight loss. Which means I’ve now lost 12lbs since child-birth and 6 lbs since I begun the 12 month challenge!
This really makes it worth it, now that I’m seeing some results from all the miles I’m walking.
But really I’m not sure if the scales are still broken after the weekend I had, I am seriously gobsmacked!
So now starts a new battle, the battle of the weekend indulgence. I have to get my head straight and stop making allowances. By rewarding myself at every opportunity, but I’m still not ready to diet. However if I’m honest I could eat healthier, so that’s what I intend to do, next week! Seeing this weight-loss has prompted me to make more changes and be honest about my eating habits.
So I’ve started doing a spin class that I found on YouTube, I only have a regular exercise bike but it feels good to be doing something other than walking, I know my real struggle is the weekend so that’s where I’m going to start and concentrate my efforts. I’m going to try to cut out takeaways and sweet treats and start to eat healthier meals. Even though I’m going to watch what I’m eating I’m not going to label this as a diet, being on a diet is too restricting and if I want to feed my baby I have to eat. I’ve just got to be sensible about what I do eat and make those calories count and most importantly remember that fat is not my friend!
I thought giving up my car would be the hardest part of this challenge but so far I’m finding walking the easiest part of this journey, now my battles with FOOD! Follow my blog with Bloglovin
Life without cheesecake….Nah
The last few weeks has been a struggle and I have battled with my love for greasy, fatty and sugary foods. But I have come to realise that I can’t and I won’t live without cheesecake, it’s not realistic to me and it is definitely a staple part of my diet.
There are hundreds of different cheesecakes, you name one and I may not have had it but I sure as hell want it! I have always loved cheesecake and always will and I won’t give it up! So there!
So what am I going to do to counteract my childish and self-destructive behaviour? Well that is the question isn’t it? I’ve got to do something and I mean literally, so this is what I’m going to do and I will call it the cheesecake rule!
For every serving of cheesecake I have I will complete one 30 minute spin class session on top of what I usually do. Now this does seem a little implausible due to the time factor, so I will either have to get up earlier or neglect the cleaning one afternoon. What a shame!! I think I know which one I’ll be doing and it gives me more of a reason to eat cheesecake!
But if this doesn’t work than I may have to look into low-fat alternatives, because as serious as I am about shifting these pounds, my life can not live without the creamy sweet dessert, cheesecake!
So if you can help by recommending any recipes that have been tried and tested and are as yummy as their full fat sugary counterpart than I will be eternally grateful!
Friday’s in my house historically is a takeaway night, Wether it’s burgers, pizza’s or fried chicken, you name it we have it. And even sometimes we eat out on a Saturday, but as we eat well 75% of the time these two cheat days of the week are OK, aren’t they? Mmmm then why do I feel so bad! Because this past weekend was no different, I made no changes and indulged when deep down I knew it wasn’t what I should be doing. But this is when the choices I make impact on the others in my life. If I don’t have that takeaway than my husband feels he can’t have it and is missing out. It’s also about breaking habits and routines and most importantly taste and cravings. That’s a lot to conquer and I won’t lie I’m gonna find it hard, but I knew this path wasn’t going to be easy. For once I’m not looking forward to the weekend and that is a first!
So after another disastrous indulgent weekend (Watch me rant here)I decided not to weigh myself this week, otherwise I’d just be setting myself up for failure. I’m just sulking, I guess, but it didn’t last long, the more I thought about it the more I just had to know, good or bad!
But ironically when I finally built myself up to stand on the emotional roulette weighing device, fate dealt me a cruel twist…..the scales didn’t work. All that fretting for nothing, typical!
So I was back where I started but with no choice but to get on with my day, so why couldn’t I stop thinking about it? I needed to know! The not knowing is doing my head in. People always say it’s not about how much you weigh but it’s about how you feel and look. Well I feel bad and look frumpy so bring on the scales, because in my head I need the scales to confirm this as crazy as that sounds. Will I ever be free from them?
Waking up early isn’t a problem when you have a 6 week old baby, because most of the time you were up anyways! Having more than 3hrs of consecutive sleep is a real treat for most mom’s in the early weeks. What I’m finding difficult is the dreary cold mornings, it’s so uninviting when you know you have an hours walk ahead of you.
But despite this I haven’t flagged and am still rocking up to the school gates early.
Not always as organised as I think though, for example the other day I woke up at 5:30 had a coffee watched the news and chilled out before the madness ensued. By 7am I was waking everyone up confident in my morning routine as I had got myself already first for a change. It wasn’t until I neared the pre-school gates that I thought back to my morning and couldn’t remember getting my daughter to brush her teeth or clean her face! So much for waking up early, luckily I had wet wipes to hand and a quick wipe over the face and she was good to go!
It’s only my second week of walking and in total I will have walked 30 miles this week, which is 6 miles a day. I’m feeling good, albeit a little sore still and I may need to find a really good chiropodist by the end of the month but I’m not looking at getting a new car any time soon. So far I’ve lost 9lbs and I’m hoping that I’ll be able to see some real results soon. But my eating habits haven’t changed, I’m hungry all the time and I’m spending energy all day. When I’m not walking I’m nursing and I’m already tired due to the lack of sleep, so food is definitely my friend at the moment as it’s the only thing keeping me going, oh and the caffeine!
So I haven’t lost any weight this week but I’m not disheartened and I’m not surprised. I know I should be watching what I’m eating but that’s not proving to be easy. Especially with the weekend looming. Look out for my video update next week by following the link Rantings of a #madmummy to see how I got on over the weekend.